• just a servant...

Wow epilepsy is scary...

I didn't realize I had been posting so much on here. I must have forgotten. That is a side effect of my epilepsy, memory loss. There are a lot of posts here. I have been thinking of starting a podcast also. That has become unnerving because the idea of talking to myself for a matter of ten to twenty minutes is hard. I've even tried to imagine an audience in front of me, that doesn't work. My life has been going well I guess you could say for my circumstances. I'm alive. I have food. I have my medication. I have salvation. Compared to 80% of the world I'm living the high life.There are just those small things in our lives that we can't control that seem to make us feel like the world is spinning out of control. ...Well to change the subject, you just can't help some people. I try and try to help my roommate and his girlfriend. She is working o being homeless, so my caseworker took it upon herself to use her free time find this woman a place to rent. Where we live low-income housing is hard to find because it is all taken up. ...So she actually finds a place to rent for this woman, Something within her budget. remember now, she is on the verge of getting evicted from a place she is renting right now due to increase in rent and what she says is a breach of contract. She is given contact information for a place to rent, gets in contact with the owner yet after talking to them she says no to the place due to the fact she'll have to share a kitchen (or bathroom) with the owner. I believe if I was on the verge of being homeless I would take what I could get. This is just a rant. Some people just haven't had it bad yet. After you get a dose of hard living you learn to appreciate the little things in life.

Back to the original topic. I had been posting regularly and then I must have had a seizure and forgotten about it. Forgotten about how regularly I had been posting and how much I enjoy it. i woke up about a month and a week ago and my pillows had blood on them and I had a horrible headache. I knew I had a seizure. I wet the bed and everything. This had to be the worst one I have had in years. It really messed up my routine. I'm going to try to get back on a regular posting routine. If for nothing else, at least I can scream on here, I have to have a place to vent. If I don't, I know it's extremely unhealthy for me.

I saw my doctor yesterday. 12/18/2019 I got my VNS swiped. They fiddled with its settings, as usual. So let's just wait and see how long it is before the next seizure hits. I'm not using drugs or alcohol. I'm taking my medications as prescribed. So let's just wait and see. There's always one coming. I chewed my tongue up so bad during the last one, it took weeks to heal. Heck, it took weeks just to get back to a regular sleeping schedule.

I like blogging. I'm going to try to get on a regular schedule so I can keep up with my health a little better. This is a good place to "remember" things.

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